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• Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.
  --Lady Astor to Winston Churchill Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it....
• We already did this function. -- Apple's MPW C compiler Error Message
• Are you married? No, I'm divorced. And what did your husband do before you divorced him?
  A lot of things I didn't know about. -- Richard Lederer "Disorder in the Cou...
• Fortune's Real-Life Courtroom Quote #18: Q: Are you married?
  A: No, I'm divorced. Q: And what did your husband do before you divorced him?...
• Are we near a slaughterhouse, or did you forget your deodorant?
• At about 2500 A.D., humankind discovers a computer problem that *must* be solved.
  The only difficulty is that the problem is NP complete and will take thousands of years even with the latest optical biologic technology available....
• Florence Flask was ... dressing for the opera when she turned to her husband and screamed, "Erlenmeyer!
  My joules! Someone has stolen my joules!" "Now, now, my dear," replied her husband, "keep your balance and reflux a moment....
• If you were my husband, I would feed you poison. If you were my wife, madam, I would take it!
  -- Lady Astor and William Churchill...