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• I said how, and why, young children, were sooner allured by love, than driven by beating, to attain good learning.
  -- ROGER ASCHAM (1515-1568) in The Schoolmaster (1570), preface...
• How do you straighten a bent pipe? Bend it!
• There are people who stictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation.
  They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it....
• All say, 'How hard it is to die' - a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live.
  -- Mark Twai...
• Then I began to think that it is very true which is commonly said, that the one half of the world knoweth not how the other half liveth.
• How many Mormons -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Six, one to screw it in and the other five to serve refreshments....
• You judge others only by how well they live up to their own capacities.
• Writing for television is a debilitating exercise. How can you inspire an audience to their best when every fourteen minutes someone interrupts to tell them that they're unfit to live with?
  The ultimate purpose of commercial television is to convince the viewer that he smells bad....
• There is no such thing as an ugly woman -- there are only the ones who do not know how to make themselves attractive.
  -- Christian Dio...