Related:

• Lady Astor: "Mr. Churchill, you're drunk!" Winston Churchill
  Yes, and you, Madam, are ugly. But tomorrow, I shall be sober....
• Braddock:] Mr Churchill, you are drunk. [Churchill
  ] And you madam, are ugly. But I shall be sober tomorrow....
• Woman on Street: Sir, you are drunk; very, very drunk.
  Winston Churchill: Madame, you are ugly; very, very ugly. I shall be sober in the morning....
• I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.
  -- Rita Rudne...
• These dogs, I tell you, they are so smart, but they worry me sometimes.
  For instance, I'm plucking this pale yellow cottage cheesy guck from their snouts, rather like cheese atop a microwave pizza, and I have this horrible feeling, for I suspect these dogs (even though their winsome black mongrel eyes would have me believe otherwise) have been rummaging through the dumpsters out behind the cosmetic surgery center again, and their snouts are accessorized with, dare I say, yuppie liposuction fat....
• I disapprove of the F-word, not because it's dirty, but because we use it as a substitute for thoughtful insults, and it frequently leads to violence.
  What we ought to do, when we anger each other, say, in traffic, is exchange phone numbers, so that later on, when we've had time to think of witty and learned insults or look them up in the library, we could call each other up...
• I disapprove of the F-word, not because it's dirty, but because we use it as a substitute for thoughtful insults, and it frequently leads to violence.
  What we ought to do, when we anger each other, say, in traffic, is exchange phone numbers, so that later on, when we've had time to think of witty and learned insults or look them up in the library, we could call each other up...
• LA: Winston your quite drunk! WC: Madame your quite ugly.
  In the morning I will be sober where as you will still be ugly! -- Sir Winston and Lady Asto...