Related:

• Kent: And how long have you been on the streets? Ba
  Going on five years, Kent. Kent: Ah. Son, your family might be watching....
• Scott: And now over to Kent Brockman for some grim economic news.
  Kent: Scott, things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the unemployment office....
• Murphy's Fourth Law of the Kitchen: When the meal you are preparing is on schedule, the guests will be forty-five minutes late.
  Corollary: When the guests are on time, the meal will be forty-five minutes late....
• Five-Minute University teaches you in five minutes what the average college student remembers five years after he or she's out of school .
  .. Say, if you want to take Spanish, what I teach you is "Como esta usted....
• If you have not changed your vacuum cleaner bag in the past five years, you can forget it, since it is a little late now.
• When one woman was asked how long she had been going to symphony concerts, she paused to calculate and replied, Forty-seven years -- and I find I mind it less and less.
  -- Louise Andrews Ke...