Related:

• The difference between wife and mistress is the difference between night and day.
  -- Harry Hershfield...
• Two peanuts went to New York. One was assaulted.
• A conscience cannot prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it. -- Harry Hershfield
• Here lies the body of Harry Hershfield. If not, notify Ginsberg & Company, Undertakers, at once.
  -- Written on grave...
• Remember, DESSERT is spelled with two `s's while DESERT is spelled with one, because EVERYONE wants two desserts, but NO ONE wants two deserts.
  -- Miss Oglethorp, Gr. 5, PS. 59...
• What's a wrench? A place where people from New York raise cattle.
• Living in California adds ten years to a man's life.
  And those extra ten years I'd like to spend in New York. -- Harry Ruby...
• New York-- to that tall skyline I come Flyin' in from London to your door New York-- lookin' down on Central Park Where they say you should not wander after dark.
  New York. -- Simon and Garfunkle...
• It seems these two guys, George and Harry, set out in a Hot Air balloon to cross the United States.
  After forty hours in the air, George turned to Harry, and said, "Harry, I think we've drifted off course!...