Related:

• In regards to Oral Roberts' claim that God told him that he would die unless he received $
  20 million by March, God's lawyers have stated that their client has not spoken with Roberts for several years....
• Quimby: [with a cold] I shouldn't have shaken hands with those old people.
  [Bart hands him some pills; Quimby eats a handful, then stumbles on stage] Lisa...
• It is coming up to March again, and Oral Roberts is looking for someone to hold him hostage.
  God didn't want the job. God punished him for what he did the last time by leaving Oral in Oklahoma....
• LORD: Let Oral Roberts Die...
• If a faith healer has to have false teeth, wear glasses and use a hearing aid, well, so much for Oral Roberts!
• The patient went to his doctor for a checkup, and the doctor wrote out a prescription for him in his usual illegible writing.
  The patient put it in his pocket, but he forgot to have it filled....
• A carpet installer decides to take a cigarette break after completing the installation in the first of several rooms he has to do.
  Finding them missing from his pocket he begins searching, only to notice a small lump in his recently completed carpet-installation....
• Motivation is everything. You can do the work of two people, but you can't be two people.
  Instead, you have to inspire the next guy down the line and get him to inspire his people....