Related:

• I am just slightly to the right of Vlad the Impale
• I am an alcoholic, in case of an emergency, please buy me a beer.
• I am sick and depraved--please feed me drugs and cookies.
• Operator, please trace this call and tell me where I am.
• For I am a Bear of Very Little Brain, and long words bother me. -- A. A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
• I am Yogi Bear's Greatest Fan!
• You wake me up early in the morning to tell me I am right?
  Please wait until I am wrong. -- John von Neumann, on being phoned at 10 a.m....
• Quote #483 "You wake me up early in the morning to tell me I am right?
  Please wait until I am wrong." -- John von Neumann [ on being phoned at 10 a.m.]...
• To whoever finds this note - I have been imprisoned by my father who wishes me to marry against my will.
  Please please please please come and rescue me. I am in the tall tower of Swamp Castle....