Related:

• PILLORY, n. A mechanical device for inflicting personal distinction -- prototype of the modern newspaper conducted by persons of austere virtues and blameless lives.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Brain, n.: The apparatus with which we think that we think.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• brain, n: The apparatus with which we think that we think.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ACCIDENT, n. An inevitable occurrence due to the action of immutable natural laws.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ABATIS, n. Rubbish in front of a fort, to prevent the rubbish outside from molesting the rubbish inside.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ROPE, n. An obsolescent appliance for reminding assassins that they too are mortal.
  It is put about the neck and remains in place one's whole life long....
• RESPIRATOR, n. An apparatus fitted over the nose and mouth of an inhabitant of London, whereby to filter the visible universe in its passage to the lungs.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...