Related:

• Put a piece of tape on a cat's foot, you have never laughed so hard!
• It is hard work and great art to make life not so serious.
  Prostitutes know this too. -- John Irving, The Hotel New Hampshire...
• It's so nice not to have to cook. -- Marge enjoys a meal in prison, "Marge in Chai
• Put the cuffs on him, sis!
• The wise individual doesn't get too attached to any of life's pleasures, knowing that wonderful science is hard at work proving it's bad for him.
  -- Bill Vaugha...
• The reason there are so few female politicians is that it is too much trouble to put makeup on two faces.
  -- Maureen Murphy...
• Dying is easy. Comedy is hard." (reply to one of his young actors who said to him
  Sir Donald, after a life so filled with success and fame, dying must be hard....
• A lot of people will urge you to put some money in a bank, and in fact--within reason--this is very good advice.
  But don't go overboard. Remember, what you are doing is giving your money to someone else to hold on to, and I think that it is worth keeping in mind that the businessmen who run banks are so worried about holding on to things that they put little chains on all their pens....
• The diminutive chains of habit are seldom heavy enough to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.
  -- Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)...