Related:

• Aperitif: a set of dentures. -- Spike Milliga
• Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion. -- Spike Milliga
• He was the nearest thing I'd seen to a human being without actually being one. -- Spike Milliga
• Money can't buy friends, but it can get you a better class of enemy. -- Spike Milliga
• Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. --Spike Milliga
• Life wasn't too bad. The trouble with man was, even while he was having a good time, he didn't appreciate it.
  Why, thought Milligan, this very moment might be the happiest in my life....
• Mother seemed pleased by my draft notice. "Just think of all the people in England, they've chosen you, it's a great honour, son.
  Laughingly I felled her with a right cross. -- Spike Milliga...
• The Magistrate renders summary judgement. You are sentenced to prison!
  The guards recognize you as a 'three-time-loser' ....
• The Senior Prom: Spike Drink