Related:

• How many Trotskyists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  (Cue typical sarcastic angry Alexei Sayle voice) It's no use trying to CHANGE it, it's got to be SMASHED !...
• Hey! That was funny. Did you hear...
• Did you hear about the Newfie that Was feeling low, so he got his face slapped.
• Something better... 1 (obvious): Excuse me. Is that your nose or did a bus park on your face?
  2 (meteorological): Everybody take cover. She's going to blow....
• People look at you kind of funny when you walk down the street naked with a gun.
• Is that a ferret in your trousers, or are you always twitchy?
• Krusty: OK, we'll start off with the baggy -- wha? [sees Homer] Those are supposed to be baggy pants.
  Baggy! Homer: Ooh. I've never had a pair of pants that fit this well in my life....
• Is your nose too big, or did you just have a tetanus shot?
• I've got this funny feeling, that you don't love me anymore.