Related:

• I used to live in a house by the freeway. When I went anywhere, I had to be going 65 MPH by the end of my driveway.
  I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights....
• There was a young poet named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan.
  When told this was so, He said, "Yes, I know....
• So much had been written about the Long Island Rail Road (Fred Allen called it "two strips of rust and a right-of-way") that I decided to take a ride on it a while back.
  What an experience! It is not an exaggeration to say that it almost shook my teeth out....
• I was going 70 miles an hour and got stopped by a cop who said, "Do you know the speed limit is 55 miles per hour?
  Yes, officer, but I wasn't going to be out that long..." -- Steven Wrigh...
• There was a young poet named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan.
  When told this was so, He said, "Yes, I know....
• In the Plaza Hotel once, when I was doing the quiz show, there was a priest in the elevator.
  I hope you're not offended by this--I'd tell a story about a rabbi but it doesn't fit, and neither did the rabbi and they finally threw him out of the synagogue....
• There was a young poet named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan.
  When told this was so, He said, "Yes, I know....