Related:

• I have such poor vision I can date anybody. -- Garry Shandling
• Marge: Hello, Mom?...Fine. You know, Abe had a very nice time with you last Sunday -- Abe
  Tell her I love her! Marge: [covering mouthpiece] Grampa, shh!...
• The most important thing in life is to love someone.
  The second most important thing in life is to have someone love you....
• Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love.
  -- Some surefire ways to make a person to fall in love with you -- Alonzo, age 9...
• Love will make you forget time, and time will make you forget love.
• Otto: OK, little dudes, time's up. Everybody out! [kids groan, leave, except for Bart and Lisa] Lisa
  Time's up? Bart: So long, Lis. I'm going to stow away under water and go where the pool goes....
• I love those slow-talking Southern girls. I was out with a Southern girl last night, took her so long to tell me she wasn't that kind of girl, she was.
  -- Woody Woodbury...
• Chandler: (entering) Hey, does anybody need anything copied?
  I'm going down to the Xerox place. Monica: Oh, no thanks....