Related:

• I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me, And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
  He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head...
• I got a ticket the other day...I pleaded insanity. The judge asked me why, and I asked him, 'would any sane person park in the passing lane?
  ' I asked, 'Judge, nice day, isn't it?' He said yes....
• I have a box of telephone rings under my bed. Whenever I get lonely, I open it up a little bit, and I get a phone call.
  One day I dropped the box all over the floor. The phone wouldn't stop ringing....
• Scott: "I remember...a time when the old Enterprise was spiraling towards Psi 2000.
  And the captain wanted to try a cold start of the warp engines....
• I went to a job interview the other day, the guy asked me if I had any questio
  I said yes, just one, if you're in a car traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, does anything happen?...
• I went to a job interview the other day, the guy asked if I had any questions.
  I said yes, just one, if you're in a car traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, does anything happen?...
• Well, there was this tiger, who woke up one morning, and just felt great (yes, just like Tony the Tige
  GREAAAAAAT). Anyway, he just felt so good, he went out and cornered a small monkey and roared at him...
• Well, there was this tiger, who woke up one morning, and just felt great (yes, just like Tony the Tige
  GREAAAAAAT). Anyway, he just felt so good, he went out and cornered a small monkey and roared at him...