Related:

• There was this New Yorker that had a lifelong ambition to be an Texan.
  Fortunately, he had an Texan friend and went to him for advice....
• A lanky Texan was mad because Texas had just become the second largest state in the Union, so he made up his mind to move to Alaska.
  He drove for three days and three nights to get there and finally he came to what looked like the state line....
• Saul was walking down the street when he ran into Morty.
  The two got to talking and Saul asked "So Morty, how's your son?...
• Three fellas up in heaven. St. Peter's interviewing them.
  He says to the first guy, "How did you get up here in heaven?...
• Never squat with your spurs on. Texan Proverb
• WOOF: doglike animal. "Who's afraid of the big bad woof?" -- Texan Dictionary
• A feed salesman is on his way to a farm. As he's driving along at forty m.
  p.h., he looks out his car window and sees a three-legged chicken running alongside him, keeping pace with his car....
• My kid said, "I want a dog." Well, I went to the kennel.
  The first dog I saw had legs four inches long in front, two feet long in back....
• One fine day, the bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route.
  No problems for the first few stops -- a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well....