TRAM
Large green thing which rumbles down city streets, carrying people
to where they want to go. Generally follows a predetermined path,
but in no way subscribes to outlandish concepts such as
"timetables". It is generally recognised that trams, like
computers, shops, and a multitude of other services, would run much
smoother if no-one actually used them.(*)
(*) Trams would also run smoother if dickheads in cars could
remember what the yellow lines meant, and how to avoid driving in
lanes that feature this popular decoration.
Computers would run smoother if not only were they not
subjected to users, but could also reject programs and data, and
just sit around all day humming.
Shops would run smoother if they held no stock, never sold
anything, and were filled in with solid concrete to prevent
looters.
-- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA
