Related:

• Politician, n.: An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared.
  When he wriggles, he mistakes the agitation of his tail for the trembling of the edifice....
• POLITICIAN, n. An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared.
  When we wriggles he mistakes the agitation of his tail for the trembling of the edifice....
• RETALIATION, n. The natural rock upon which is reared the Temple of Law.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• DOG, n. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship.
  This Divine Being in some of his smaller and silkier incarnations takes, in the affection of Woman, the place to which there is no human male aspirant....
• QUIVER, n. A portable sheath in which the ancient statesman and the aboriginal lawyer carried their lighter arguments.
  He extracted from his quiver, Did the controversial Roman, An argument well fitted To the question as submitted, Then addressed it to the liver, Of the unpersuaded foeman....
• ARENA, n. In politics, an imaginary rat-pit in which the statesman wrestles with his record.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• AUCTIONEER, n. The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• MYRMIDON, n. A follower of Achilles -- particularly when he didn't lead.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• AGITATOR, n. A statesman who shakes the fruit trees of his neighbors -- to dislodge the worms.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...