Related:

• This office will open at 7 AM and close at 8 PM except on the Sabbath, on which day we will remain closed.
  Each employee is expected to spend the Sabbath by attending church and contributing liberally to the cause of the Lord....
• Each day fill lamps, clean chimneys, and trim wicks. Wash the windows once a week. -- Work Rule
• 6) Men employees will be given time off each week for courting purposes, or two evenings a week if they go regularly to church.
  (7) After an employee has spent his thirteen hours of labor in the office, he should spend the remaining time reading the Bible and other good books....
• Office employees will daily sweep the floors, dust the furniture, shelves, and showcases.
  -- Work Rule...
• Each clerk will bring in a bucket of water and scuttle of coal for the day's business.
  -- Work Rule...
• Make your pens carefully. You may whittle nibs to your individual taste. -- Work Rule
• To prevent baldness, follow the few simple rules which are listed here
  1. Eat at least five ounces of parsnips each day, while standing on your head....
• Live each day to the fullest. It may be your last.
• You Might be a Microsoft Employee If... 1. Every night you dream of torturing Linus Torvalds 2.
  Every morning you say, "I pledge allegiance to the logo of the United Corporation of Microsoft....