A Mother Mouse Was Taking Her Large Brood For A Stroll Across The Kitchen Floor One Day When The Local Cat, By A Feat Of Stealth Unusual Even For Its Species, Managed To Trap Them In A Corner.

Once upon a time there was a beautiful young girl taking a stroll through the woods.
All at once she saw an extremely ugly bull frog seated on a log and to her amazement the frog spoke to her....
You can't expect a mother to be with a small child all the time" Margaret Mead once remarked
with her usual good sense, but in 1978 she shocked feminists by snapping that women don't really have children to put them in day care twelve hours a day, either....
How do you know she is a unicorn?" Molly demanded. "And why were you afraid to let her touch you?
I saw you. You were afraid of her." "I doubt that I will feel like talking for very long," the cat replied without rancor....
Homer: Lisa, the important thing is for your mother to repress what happened.
Push it deep down inside her, so she'll never annoy us again....
Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement.
-- Florida Scott-Maxwell...
Much to his Mum and Dad's dismay, Horace ate himself one day.
He didn't stop to say his grace, he just sat down and ate his face....
I'm Catholic ... My mother and I were unpacking and she found my diaphragm.
I had to tell her it was a bathing cap for my cat. -- Lizz Winstead...