Related:

• Your children begin to look middle aged
• How many feminists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Two. One to threaten that as a mother, she will be unable to provide her children light without federal assistance...
• If the purpose of pornography is to excite sexual desire, it is unnecessary for the young, inconvenient for the middle-aged, and unseemly for the old.
  -- Malcolm Muggeridge...
• Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard To fetch her poor daughter a dress.
  When she got there, the cupboard was bare And so was her daughter, I guess......
• A mother mouse was taking her large brood for a stroll across the kitchen floor one day when the local cat, by a feat of stealth unusual even for its species, managed to trap them in a corner.
  The children cowered, terrified by this fearsome beast, plaintively crying, "Help, Mother!...
• Middle-Aged Mutant Ninja Animator.
• Someday there is going to be a book about a middle aged man with a good job, a beautiful wife and two lovely children who still manages to be happy.
  -- Bill Vaugha...
• I want to be young and wild, and then I want to be middle-aged and rich, and then I want to be old and annoy people by pretending that I'm deaf.
  -- Edmund : Nob and Nobility...
• She was so ugly her mother used to babyfeed her with a slingshot.