Related:

• Lenny: See, all along I've been telling Carl I'm married to a beauty queen.
  Now, he's coming over for dinner. Marge: Oh, Lenny, I'm sure he'll like your wife no matter what she looks like....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Friday: Freeze. FBI: the jig is up. Abe: All right, I admit i
  I am the Lindbergh baby. Waah! Waah! Goo goo....
• Phoebe: I don't know how to say this, but I think when your wife's spirit left her body, it um, kind of stuck around in me.
  Mr. Adelman: You're saying, my wife is in you? Phoebe...
• I think my wife may be getting somewhat overweight.
  "Oh, how can you tell?" "Well, last night when she sat on my face, I couldn't hear the stereo....
• Homer: Lisa, honey, are you going to be OK? Lisa: Bleeding Gums was my hero and I never got to tell him how I felt.
  Homer: Oh, I'm sure he knew, and I'm sure that wherever he is now, he's happy....
• A woman was married to a golfer. One day she asked, "If I were to die, would you remarry?
  After some thought, the man replied, "Yes, I've been very happy in this marriage and I would want to be this happy again....
• If naebody care for me, I 'll care for naebody.
  -- Robert Burns (1759-1796) -- I hae a Wife o' my Ai...
• Mr. B: There is a wonderful girl's future at stake.
  Homer: Well, if she's so wonderful, give her an A!...