Related:

• And now, Crime-stoppers, let's repeat the "Crime-stopper's Oath"...
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• ORDER The process of telling the waiter what you would like to eat, preferably a choice from that on the menu.
  Following the ordering process, you will make a note of everything that they forget to bring you, and finally find the courage to kick up a stink when the meal's over and everyone's leaving....
• MEET GOD IN PERSON! This Thursday from 12-2pm, God will be signing copies of his new single, "I Don't Like Fridays" in the record department at Myer Southland.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA....
• VANQUISH A word most commonly used in solemn ceremonies, usually of the form "Behold the devil, I now vanquish thee" in weird religious ceremonies or bad fantasy books.
  The amusing thing being that the speaker is generally of the mistaken belief that the use of a little Olde English will result in the demise of Satan for all eternity....
• Conversation stoppers for a cocktail party: Half the people in this room are connected to organized crime.
  Me? I'm a concert accordionist. You may have heard me on TV the other night on the Dr....
• KENNEL A place where sleeping dogs lie, shelter from rain, and chew on dubious bones dug up from other people's garden.
  Toxic Custard advice of the week is: Never steal anything from a Rottweiler's kennel....
• ISMISM Belief in any distinctive doctrine, theory or practice.
  Ismism was started up in the mid-1980s by a splinter group from "Atheists For Christ"....