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• 1) I love you. (2) This won't hurt a bit. (3) The Mercedes is paid for.
  (4) The check is in the mail. (5) I was just going to call you....
• 1. That's the way we've always done it around here.
  2. I'm so busy, I just forgot. 3. It didn't appear that important....
• Top Ten Things Overheard At The ANSI C Draft Committee Meeting
  10: Sorry, but that's too useful. 9: Dammit, little-endian systems *are* more consistent!...
• Something better... 1 (obvious): Excuse me. Is that your nose or did a bus park on your face?
  2 (meteorological): Everybody take cover. She's going to blow....
• 9 Very Unsuccessful Pick-up Lines: ---------------------------------- 1.
  Would you like to see my boa constrictor?" 2. "Is that a false nose?...
• 1. "I'm down here" 2. "Just because I've got bells on my shoes doesn't mean I'm a sissy" 3.
  I was once a lawn ornament for John Bon Jovi" 4....
• As many of you know, I am taking a class here at UNC on Personality.
  One of the tests to determine personality in our book was so incredibly useful and interesting, I just had to share it....
• Just a few of the perfect excuses for having some strawberry shortcake.
  Pick one. 1: It's less calories than two pieces of strawberry shortcake....
• EVERYTHING I NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED IN KINDERGARTEN 1.
  Share everything. 2. Play fair. 3....