Related:

• Man: Well, sir, I'll be honest with you: I need a large African elephant and I need it today.
  But I'm afraid this just isn't what I'm looking for....
• Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant? A: With a blue-elephant gun.
  Q: How do you shoot a pink elephant? A: Twist its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue-elephant gun....
• Man: I'm here to pick up the Ambassador from Ghana.
  Lisa: Well he's not here! Nobody's here! And none of you should be here!...
• Q: How do you make an elephant float? A: You get two scoops of elephant and some rootbeer...
• What's the difference between a JAP and an elephant?
  10 pounds. How do you get them to be the same? Force feed the elephant....
• How do humans manage to exist in these fragile cases?
• Great Lover, n.: A man who can breathe through his ears.
• Ned: [on a TV] Now, in case all that smiling didn't cheer you up, there's one thing that never fail
  a nice glass of warm milk, a little nap -- and a total frontal lobotomy....