Related:

• Lisa: Isn't anybody going to show up? Lovejoy: Well, Lisa, we've waited an hour.
  [clears his throat, reads] Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to bid farewell to Blood and Guts Murphy....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Grimes: God, he eats like a pig. Lenny: I dunno.
  Pigs tend to chew. I'd say he eats more like a duck....
• Why don't you come on over here, sit on my lap, and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?
  -- Pick up line...
• A woman was married to a golfer. One day she asked, "If I were to die, would you remarry?
  After some thought, the man replied, "Yes, I've been very happy in this marriage and I would want to be this happy again....
• Guy: Greetings, good men. Might I trouble you for a drink?
  Moe: Oh, get out of here, Homer. Guy: Homer? Who is Homer?...
• Picard: "Ambassador, your logic escapes me. If I didn't know better, I would say that your judgement is influenced by your emotions.
  Spock: "You speak as if my father would if he were here, Picard....
• A man fell off a mountain and, as he fell, saw a branch and grabbed for it.
  By superhuman effort he was able to get a precarious grip on it....
• A man fell off a mountain and, as he fell, saw a branch and grabbed for it.
  By superhuman effort he was able to get a precarious grip on it....