Related:

• Committee Rules: (1) Never arrive on time, or you will be stamped a beginner.
  (2) Don't say anything until the meeting is half ove...
• Five rules for eternal misery: 1) Always try to exhort others to look upon you favorably.
  2) Make lots of assumptions about situations and be sure to treat these assumptions as though they are reality....
• If you can't make a mistake, you can't make anything.
  -- Collins's Law 1. Everybody who matters is stupid now and then....
• Rangnekar's Modified Rules Concerning Decisions 1) If you must make a decision, delay it.
  2) If you can authorize someone else to avoid a decision, do so....
• Long's Notes 1) Always store beer in a dark place.
  2) Any priest or shaman must be presumed guilty until proved innocent....
• The five rules of Socialism: 1. Don't think. 2. If you do think, don't speak.
  3. If you think and speak, don't write. 4. If you think, speak and write, don't sign....
• Eleven reasons a cucumber is better than a man: (1) Cucumbers can stay up all night, and you won't have to sleep in the wet spot.
  (2) Cucumbers don't play the guitar and try to find themselves....
• 1) Any given program, when running, is obsolete. (2) Any given program costs more and takes longer.
  (3) If a program is useful, it will have to be changed....