Related:

• She asked me, "What's your sign?" I blinked and answered "Neon," I thought I'd blow her mind...
• A girl with psychic powers, She said "T-Bone, what's your sign?
  I blinked and answered "Neon" - I thought I'd blow her mind. -- Tom "T-Bone" Stanku...
• Haven't you ever known what it is like to be at peace with your Maker?
  asked the clergyman who was counseling the wayward girl....
• One of the causes of divorce today is the oft asked questio
  What is for lunch today?" The reason is that this question is often followed by the response, "I don't know, the label came off the can....
• Homer: Wait a minute...there's something bothering me about this place.
  [looks around] I know! This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit....
• That wife of mine is a liar," said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in a bar.
  "How do you know?" the friend asked. "She didn't come home last night, and when I asked her where she'd been she said she'd spent the night with her sister Shirley....
• I was on a ski lift with a strange guy who announced that he just got out of prison and then asked me if I wanted to know why.
  I reply "no". The guy answers anyway that he pushed a total stranger off the ferris wheel....
• I believe you have the wrong number," said the old gentleman into the phone.
  You'll have to call the weather bureau for that information....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...