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• Don't give me that intelligent life stuff - give me something I can blow up.
• Hairdressers give the best blow jobs.
• I give you the 15 <SMASH<. . . 10 Commandme
• Dear Bart, I am using the stationery Mom and Dad gave me &l
  for my birthday> to inform you that we are now brother and sister in name only....
• I wonder, are the San Francisco Giants moving to Florida to avoid the danger of earthquakes?
• Homer: I'm going to have to shut it down myself. Fat, don't fail me now!
  [jumps in car; tires blow out] D'oh!...
• That Reverend Lovejoy <really> displeases Me. I think I'll give him a canker sore.
  -- God, "Homer the Heretic...
• A man meets a girl at a party and asks her if she fancies a quick 68.
  "A 68 ?" asks the girl, "What's one of those then?...