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• Ask a man which way he is going to vote, and he will probably tell you.
  Ask him, however, why, and vagueness is all. -- Bernard Levin, in "Daily Mail", 1964...
• Bart: Wow, a former president living right across the street.
  Homer: Oh, why did he have to move in on _my_ territory?...
• Had he and I but met By some old ancient inn, But ranged as infantry, We should have sat us down to wet And staring face to face, Right many a nipperkin!
  I shot at him as he at me, And killed him in his place....
• We love our little Johnny He's the best little boy in all the world And we wouldn't trade him for anything That's how much we love him.
  No, we couldn't live without him So that's why, since he died, We keep him safe in our G....
• We'd all like to vote for the best man, but he's never a candidate.
• Jasper: Why bother voting? He's guilty. Flanders: Well, we might as well make it official.
  Homer: What does "sequestered" mean? Skinner: If the jury is deadlocked they're put up in a hotel together so they can't communicate with the outside world....
• The lesson these days is the vulgarity of wealth. We know that wealth will vote for the same thing which the worst and meanest of the people vote for.
  Wealth will vote for rum, will vote for tyranny, will vote for slavery, wiil vote against the ballot, will vote against international copyright, will vote against schools, colleges or any high direction of public money....
• I GUESS OF ALL MY UNCLES, I liked Uncle Caveman the best.
  We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he'd eat one of us....