Related:

• TOG: Take Out Garbage
• Goodman: Now, who knows how the Skinners could have resolved this problem?
  [everyone puts their hands up] Without resorting to violence....
• Here's a good gag if you go swimming in a swamp and when you com out you're all covered with leeches.
  Just say, "Hey, has anybody seen my raisins?" (Because leeches kind of look like big raisins....
• Princesses don't do dishes or take out garbage.
• GIGO: Garbage in garbage out.
• I think a good product would be "Baby Duck Hat". It's a fake baby duck, which you strap on top of your head.
  Then you go swimming underwater until you find a mommy duck and her babies, and you join them....
• The first thing was, I learned to forgive myself. Then, I told myself, "Go ahead and do whatever you want, it's okay by me.
  -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
• Instead of a Seeing Eye dog, what about a gun? It's cheaper than a dog, plus if you walk around shooting all the time people are going to get out of the way.
  Cars, too! -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
• I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff
  hen when somebody comes up act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?...