Related:

• I owed my friend George $25. For about three weeks I owed it to him.
  The whole time I had the money on me---he didn't know it....
• Wanna tell you all a story 'bout a man named Jed, A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed.
  But then one day he was shootin' at some food, When up through the ground come a bubblin' crude -- oil, that i...
• I know the guy who writes all those bumper stickers. He hates New York. -- Steven Wrigh
• Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo.
  He got pretty good. He could go under a rug. -- Steven Wrigh...
• The doctor says he has to amputate all of me. -- [Imitation] Steven Wrigh
• Oh, he [a big dog] hunts with papa," she said. "He says Don Carlos [the dog] is good for almost every kind of game.
  He went duck hunting one time and did real well at it....
• My friend Winnie is a procrastinator. He didn't get his birthmark until he was eight years old.
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them.
  Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. -- Steven Wrigh...