Related:

• Moonstruck Snap out of it! --Cher to Nicholas Cage
• You may have the right to go from the traffic signal, but if they other driver is in a Peterbuilt truck, it may be judicious not to press your right too far.
  -- Confucius Say...
• The devout Jew was beside himself because his son had been dating a shiksa, so he went to visit his rabbi.
  The rabbi listened solemnly to his problem, took his hand, and said, "Pray to God....
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when you walk to work, and find your dress is stuck in the back of your panty hose.
• Marge: Do you want your son to become become Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, or a sleazy male stripper?
  Homer: Can't he be both, like the late Earl Warren?...
• You may be redneck... if the color of your truck is Bondo.
• You may be redneck... if the color of your truck is primer.
• If your monthly phone bill includes over seventy-five dollars' worth of calls to Entertainment Tonight 900-number opinion polls, get a life .
  .. If you always make a point to sit up front on a bus so you can "chat" with the driver ....
• I was lying in the street moaning and groaning from an attack of asthma when the driver of a library truck stuck his head out of the window and said, "Shh!
  Shh!" -- Stanley Myron Handelma...