Related:

• When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle.
  A little old lady had to help me across the street. -- Rod Schmid...
• Two obviously high-class old ladies are strolling down a city street when they run across a grizzled
  agged old derelict lying drunk in the gutter, covered with garbage, sewer water running all over him....
• SAGITTARIUS (Nov.22 - Dec.21) Your efforts to help a little old lady cross a street will backfire when you learn that she was waiting for a bus.
  Subdue impulse you have to push her out into traffic....
• All most people want is a little more than they'll ever get.
• Old people know more about being young than young people about being old.
• The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any toys.
  But this one little boy had gotten an old enema bag and filled it with rocks, and he would go around and whap the other children across the face with it....
• The beer across the street is much better.
• People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.