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• Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if God won't have you, the devil must.
• Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, If God won't have you, the devil must.
• You know it's going to be a rotten day when... your wife wakes up feeling amorous and you have a headache.
• Don't get up too early in the morning, because the early bird gets the worm, and no matter how you try to prepare it, breakfast is just awful.
• I got into an elevator at work and this man followed in after me.
  .. I pushed '1' and he just stood there... I said 'Hi, where you going?...
• Don't let the best you have done so far be the standard for the rest of you life.
• Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up.
• Make no judgements where you have no compassion. -- Anne Mc Caffrey
• The doctor had just finished giving the young man a thorough physical examination.
  The best thing for you to do," the M.D. said, "is give up drinking, give up smoking, get to bed early and stay away from women....