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• I owed my friend George $25. For about three weeks I owed it to him.
  The whole time I had the money on me---he didn't know it....
• Three fellas up in heaven. St. Peter's interviewing them.
  He says to the first guy, "How did you get up here in heaven?...
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• One day I got on the usual bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl.
  ..I sat beside her. I said, "Hi," and she said, "Hi," and then I said, "Nice day, isn't it?...
• I saw a close friend of mine the other day... He said, "Stephen, why haven't you called me?
  I said, "I can't call everyone I want. My new phone has no five on it....
• One day, when I came home from work, I accidently put my car key in the door of my apartment building.
  .. I turned it... and the whole building started up....
• Marge: But on the other hand, when you don't take advantage of an opportunity, you can end up regretting it for the rest of your life.
  Homer: You're right, Marge. Just like the time I could have met Mr....
• A horrible little boy came up to me and said, `You know in your book The Martian Chronicles?
  ' I said, `Yes?' He said, `You know where you talk about Deimos rising in the East?...
• I have a box of telephone rings under my bed. Whenever I get lonely, I open it up a little bit, and I get a phone call.
  One day I dropped the box all over the floor. The phone wouldn't stop ringing....