Related:

• Riviera: Hi, everybody! Board: [unenthused] Hi, Dr.
  Nick. -- At a malpractice board hearing, "Twenty-Two Short Films About Springfield...
• Troy: I'm here to tell you about `Spiffy!', the twenty-first-century stain remover.
  Let's meet the inventor, Dr. Nick Riviera. Nick: Thank you, Troy!...
• Smithers: [collapsed] Help... me. Riviera: Holy smokes, you need booze.
• on top of a telephone pole] Cletus: Hey you know what?
  I could call my ma while I'm up here. [yelling] Hey, maw!...
• Troy: Hello, I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such movies as `Cry, Yuma' and `Here Comes the Coast Guard'!
  But today I'd like to tell you about a pleasant-tasting candy that actually cleans and straightens your teeth!...
• The most rewarding part was when he gave me my money. -- Nick Riviera, "The Springfield File
• Wadlow: [lifts Nelson out of the sewer by his head] Do you find something comical about my appearance when I'm driving my automobile?
  Nelson: Yeah. Wadlow: Everyone needs to drive a vehicle, even the very tall....
• C'mon, it's eleven o'clock -- I need some sugar.
  -- Bart, "Twenty-Two Short Films About Springfield...
• I finally look like a real person!
  -- Lisa, "Twenty-Two Short Films About Springfield" (meta-humor alert)...