Related:

• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Ned: Well, if God didn't make little green apples, it's Homer Simpson!
  How long have you been here? Homer: Twenty of the suckiest minutes of my life....
• Inspector: Mr. Burns, in twenty years, I have never seen such a shoddy, deplorable.
  .. Burns: Oh, look! Some ... careless person has left thousands and thousands of dollars just lying here on my ....
• Bart: You know, Gramma really likes it when her boyfriends are nice to me.
  ..she 'specially likes it when they give me money. Bu...
• Skinner: Mother doesn't approve of me dating so I need you to keep her busy for a few hours while Edna and I sneak out.
  [sneaks out] Bart: Oh, I can't take much more of this....
• Burns: Make yourselves at home. Bart: Hear that Dad?
  You can lie around in your underwear and scratch yourself....
• When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?
• FORTRAN - Your grey-haired grandmother. People make fun of her just because she is old, but if you take the time to listen, you can learn from her experiences and her mistakes.
  During her lifetime she has acquired many useful skills in sewing and cooking (subroutine libraries) That no younger women can match, so be thankful she is still around....
• Lisa: They don't like being broken up. Marge: We've got to be realistic, kids.
  Who's going to have a big enough heart to take care of 25 puppies?...