Related:

• Homer: Marge, the boy was wearing a hawaiian shirt.
  Marge: So? Homer: There's only two kind of guys who wear those shi...
• Homer: Why don't people like me, Marge? Marge: Mmm, everyone likes you, you're a wonderful person.
  Homer: Why don't those stupid idiots let me in their crappy club for jerks?...
• Moe: Come on, don't take this so hard, Homer. You still got that other kid, uh.
  .. Lisa. Let's, uh, take her out hunting tomorrow...
• Marge: I'm very sorry you feel that way, because John invited us all out for a drive today, and we're going.
  Homer: Woah-ho-ho, not me! And not because John's gay, but because he's a sneak....
• Homer: That John is the greatest guy in the world. We've gotta have him and his wife over for drinks sometime.
  Marge: Hmm, I don't think he's married, Homer. Home...
• Homer: It's a miracle! John: [holding the Santa remote] No, ultrasuede is a miracle.
  This is just good timing. Marge: Oh, Homie, I'm so glad you're safe....
• Homer: So anyway, Lenny and Carl are never around on Wednesdays and they don't tell me where they go.
  It's like a conspiracy. Bart: A conspiracy, eh? You think they might be involved in the Kennedy assassination in some way?...
• Mindy: Homer...you don't have to do anything you don't want to.
  Homer: Well, maybe I want to...but then I think about Marge and the kids....
• Marge: Well I never thought it would come to this, but I guess we'll have to sell Grandma's Civil War doll.
  Lisa: Oh Mom, are you sure you want to sell a family heirloom to pay _the gas_ bill?...