Related:

• Smithers: Er, um, there's some candy right here, Sir.
  [points to a box] Why don't we eat this instead of stealing?...
• Man #1: Champ, do you feel remorse for your crime? Tatum
  Oh, yes. Believe me, my god, if I could turn back the clock on my mother's stair-pushing, I would certainly....
• Marge: Homer, the guest should get the last pork chop.
  Homer: But I'm still hungry! [under the table, Jay's and Homer's stomach growl at each other like dogs] [Homer's frightens Jay's into whimpering] Jay...
• Smithers: [feeding him] Here comes the endangered condor into the power lines.
  .. I've got Bobo hot from the dryer. Careful not to burn yourself on his eye....
• Homer: Ah, another perfect day in my perfect life with my perfect job.
  Wiggum: [driving by] Hey, just heard the news over the squawk box....
• Burns: Ahoy-hoy? Homer: [speaking through a kazoo] Hello, Mr.
  Burns. This is the kidnapper. Do you miss your son?...
• Burns: Homer, your bravery and quick thinking have turned a potential Chernobyl into a mere Three Mile Island.
  Bravo! [Places an award around Homer's neck....
• Homer: [thinks] A million dollars. My wife cost me a million dollars.
  Marge: Homer? Would you like some more macaroni and cheese?...
• Marge: Welcome to Pretzel Wagon. May I take your order?
  Lenny: [hesitating] Uh, let's see. I'll have... one, uh....