Related:

• Rev.L: [reluctantly, to phone] Hello, Ned. Ned: Sorry to bother you, Rev.
  Lovejoy, but I'm kind of in a tizzy. My son Todd just told us he didn't want to eat his damn vegetables....
• Son, always be sincere. Whether you mean it or not. -- Michael Flande
• Ned: Our annual father-son rafting trip is next weekend.
  Bart: [thinking] Oh no, me bring Homer on a rafting trip?...
• Bart: But Dad! I've never won anything in my life!
  Homer: Son, this is the only time I'm ever gonna say this....
• Homer: All right, knock it off! Ned: Knock what off, Simpson?
  Homer: You've been rubbing my nose in it since I got here!...
• Welcome my son, welcome to the machine.
• You are not my son! -- Homer Simpson Boy-Scoutz n the Hood
• Pr.Sk: I caught your son defacing school property this morning.
  We estimate the damage is $75, and frankly, we think it's terribly unfair that other taxpayers should foot the bill....
• Bart: I am through with working. Working is for chumps.
  Homer: Son, I'm proud of you. I was <twice> your age before I figured that out....