Related:

• I just met this girl Marge Bouvier and I want to force her to like me.
  -- Homer visits the school guidance counselor, "The Way We Wa...
• Counselor: Do you have any plans for after graduation?
  Homer: Me? I'm gonna drink a lot of beer and stay out ALL NIGHT....
• The only advice I can give you is, uh, try to share common interests and spend, spend, spend.
  -- Guidance counselor dispenses advice, "The Way We Wa...
• The Counselor and I will be indisposed today. -- Rike
• Lovejoy: Marge, we can't tell you how sorry we are.
  Ned: You have our deepest condol-diddely-olences....
• Data: "Counselor, I believe your aim is improving." -- "Qpid", Stardate unknow
• Homer: So, uh, what are you in for? Marge: I'm a political prisoner.
  Last time <I> ever take a stand... Homer: Well, I'm here for being me....
• Lisa: Mom! Homer: Huh -- wha -- Lisa! What's up? Lisa
  I just had a bad dream! Homer: Oh, sure. You just lie down and tell me all about it....
• Riker: "I don't believe this!" Troi: "He's king to his particular hill, Commander.
  You have to treat him that way." Riker: "Counselor, this feels like a perfect job for you....