Related:

• Homer: We can't lose! Look at the name of the dog I bet on.
  Marge: "She's The Fastest"...Homer, I don't think that means necessarily -- Announce...
• Announcer 1: Uh oh, here comes our friend, Bullwinkle J.
  Moose. Homer: Heh heh heh, Bullwinkle's antler sprung a leak....
• Apu: Well, time to replenish the hot dog roller. La, la -- oops [drops a hot dog] Oh, no -- it is encrusted with filth.
  [blows it off] Oh well, let's sell it anyway....
• Never pet a dog that's on fire.
• Announcer: It's a tool that every home handyman needs!
  It's a jigsaw! It's a power drill! It's a wood-turning lathe!...
• Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, this is the end: the end of dog racing.
  Everyone: Boo! Marge: I think they're in love....
• Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen -- please.
  We have a major break in the case. We recovered the burglar's hankerchief from one of the crime scenes....
• Marge: [thinking] Everywhere I look, someone is breaking the law.
  Dog, no leash. Man, littering. Horse, not wearing diaper....
• Marge: I think there's really something wrong with Santa's Little Helper.
  He was up barking all night, and dug up the back yard worse than ever....