[Caption: SPRINGFIELD: A CITY HELD HOSTAGE. DAY ONE (dramatization)]
Jebediah Obadiah Zachariah Jedediah Springfield, he was.
[A cheesy documentary. Jebediah chops wood.]
In 1838, along the way, he met a ferocious bear.
[What is obviously a man in a bear costume appears.
Jebediah discards his axe and wrestles the bear.
The caption `dramatization' reappears.]
And killed him with his bare hands. That's B-A-R-E hands.
[Jebediah wins.]
We've recently uncovered evidence that the bear, in fact, probably
killed <him>.
-- "The Telltale Head"
