Related:

• Fat Tony: How do you know you don't like bribes if you've never taken one?
  Here. [puts some cash into Rex's hand] Banne...
• Wiggum: You! Big Daddy: Welcome to my maison, Chief.
  I've been expecting you. Wiggum: Is that so, Big Daddy?...
• Bart: Chief Wiggum, think you have room in your jail for a two-time loser?
  Wiggum: Well, no, frankly. But that never stopped us before....
• Sideshow Bob: Bart, I must know. How did you untangle my web?
  Chief Wiggum: Yeah, Bart, pull us in! Bart: Well, I'd hate to tell the number one cop in town how to do his job....
• Let that be a lesson to the rest of you nuts!
  -- Chief Wiggum addresses a bowl of walnuts, "I Love Lisa...
• Brooks: [Yiddish voice] What's with the sir -- [normal voice] What's with the siren?
  Wiggum: Evening, Simpson. You got a short and your taillight started blinking when you made that turn....
• I can assure you that we're using the most advanced scientific techniques in the field of.
  .. [searching for the word] body-finding. -- Police Chief Wiggum's briefing, "Bart the Murdere...
• Wiggum: If it isn't my old friends from Springfield, the Simpsons!
  What brings you folks to New Orleans? Ba...
• Lou: Uh, Chief, what about those coleslaw punks? Wiggum
  Well, I... I can't be everywhere at once, Lou, now can I?...