Related:

• Homer: I can't wait 'till they throw his hatless butt in jail.
  Marge: Homer, you shouldn't eat so much food. It's bad for your heart....
• Lovejoy: What in God's name is going on here? Wiggum
  Isn't this 742 Evergreen Terrace? Lovejoy: No, that's next door....
• Gravedigger: Two more ladies come by earlier that day.
  One was real pretty, t'other, sort of plain....
• Bart: What's wrong, Dad? Homer: [strained] You know that feeling you get when a thousand knives of fire are stabbing you in the heart?
  I'm having that right now...[normal] Ooh, bacon!...
• Escape charges were lodged against a Buffalo burglary suspect last June after he overpowered two city police officers without laying a hand on them.
  In the words of the police report, the man "did escape from custody, in that the defendant did flatulate in the car causing an exteme noxious odor forcing officers to roll down all windows in the vehicle to ventilate it, at which time defendant lunged his body out the side window....
• Oh, it could be worse. Some dog could do the operation.
  -- Homer can't afford a coronary bypass, "Homer's Triple Bypa...
• This is fascinating, Mom. Did you know they're going to stop Dad's heart for six whole minutes?
  -- Lisa describes Homer's operation, "Homer's Triple Bypa...
• Ice Cream man: [driving past in his truck] I'm all out of ice cream!
  [to Bart and Lisa] It's true, you know....
• Apu: Poor Mister Homer. Could it be that my snack treats are responsible for his wretched health?
  Customer: I need some jerky. Apu: Would you like some vodka with that?...