Related:

• Monty: [dropping a ring into a champagne glass] Now
  my dear, if you look in your champagne, I think you'll find a little surprise -- [Jackie drinks it, swallows the ring, and chokes a little] Heh, uh, not to worry, I believe there's another one around here somewhere -- [reaches into boiling fondue, burns himself] [kneeling] My darling, since my kneecaps are filling with fluid as we speak....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Jackie: Oh, my favorite song. This is so nice! Abe
  I can't remember when I felt this young. Oh...I really can't!...
• Bob: So sorry, Mr. Simpson. Your house is blocking construction of our new Matlock Expressway.
  [camera pulls back to show expressway looming overhead] Now, I am a fair man....
• Jackie: And here's a picture of me getting arrested for indecent exposure.
  It was the most embarrassing day of my life. Abe...
• Marge: Hello, Mom?...Fine. You know, Abe had a very nice time with you last Sunday -- Abe
  Tell her I love her! Marge: [covering mouthpiece] Grampa, shh!...
• Abe: Honey! Are you sure you want to be Mrs. Montgomery Burns?
  Wouldn't you rather be Mrs. Abraham J. Simpson?...
• Marge: You know, Mom, you and Abe have a lot in common.
  Um...hmm. You both got swindled by that telemarketing scam!...
• A Southern boy graduates from high school heads north to college, taking the family dog, Old Blue with him, for company.
  He's only been there a few weeks when he gets a call from his girlfriend...