Related:

• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am....
• Voice Mail My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
  A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here....
• Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can't come to the phone right now
  o after the tone, please leave your name and number, then talk briefly about your childhood and tell me what comes to mind when you hear the following word...
• Ring...click....(sound of loud music in background).
  ..Hello? - just a second while I turn the stereo off (sound of person running to click off music, which gets quiet....
• At the sound of the tone, you will be charged $10 for the first minute and $
  2 for each additional minute. Please leave your name, phone number and a message....
• Hello. Lindsey's not home now--this is his domestic droid speaking.
  I'm not programmed to answer the phone, so just leave a message, and Lindsey will get back to you as soon as possible....
• beep, beep, beep> The number you have reached, Seven.
  Six. Seven. One. Two. Three. Four. [Use your number here....
• Thank you for calling the Confessional Hotline. Father Durway's not here right now
  but if you'll leave your name, number, and confession at the tone, he'll get back to you with absolution as soon as possible....