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• Actual Caddy Quotes? Golfer: "I've played so poorly all day
  I think I'm going to go drown myself in that lake....
• THE CREATION: In the beginning there was the computer.
  And God said %>Let there be light! #Enter user id....
• Dog Quotations "If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise" --Unknown "Some days you're the dog
  ome days you're the hydrant." -- Unknown "Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies....
• This nice, old Jewish man really wanted to win the lottery.
  So, one week, he goes to synagogue and he says (good Yiddish accent mandatory), "Oy, Lord of heaven and earth, imagine how much good I could do with ze money I vould vin if I von the lottery!...
• Three nuns die and go to heaven, at the pearly gates they are confronted by Saint Peter who says "Well girls before you can get into heaven you must answer a question.
  Saint Peter asks the first nun, "Who was the first man on earth?...
• Placing Blame This 85 year old couple, having been married almost 60 years, had died in = a car crash.
  They had been in good health the last ten years mainly due to her interest in health food, and exercise....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• The Earth is now 100% full. Deleting will now begi......