Related:

• The Importance of Not Being Seen -- Take Two I just found your Stupid Criminal Hall of Shame, and I think it's great!
  I have one for you, from Peoria, Illinois (my home town)....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• The Importance of Having the Proper Identification -- Take One Excerpted from "The Oregonian" (Portland, Oregon), 10 Apr 97
  Police cited William Angus Barter for forgery early last month and then let him go....
• THE DARWIN AWARDS Date: December,1997 The Darwin Award is made each year to the person who has managed to kill themselves (and therefore prevent the survival of their genes - hence Darwin!
  ) in the most bizarre way imaginable. Previous winners have included the man killed when the vending machine he was trying to extract a can of Coke from fell on him, and last years aviator who strapped a JATO module (rocket) to his car and lit the blue touchpaper....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• The Importance of Advance Planning The husband of a woman I used to work with held up a Domino's that was located directly across the street from the police station.
  When he left the store, the employee from Domino's went outside and said to the policeman standing across the street that he had just been robbed....
• A man was very shy, and couldn't speak to more than two people at a time without getting nervous.
  His boss and wife both suggested that he take an Andrew Carnegie course....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....