The Federal Government's New, Unabridged medical Dictionary:
Barium: What you do when the patient dies
Urine: The opposite of "You're out!"
Cauterize: Made eye contact with her
Ova: Finished; done with
Sperm: To reject, look away from
Dilate: To live a long time
Enema: Opposite of a friend
Node: Was aware of
White count: The number of Caucasians
hernia: Pertaining to a female's knee
Fibrillate: To tell a small lie
D&C: Where Washington is
Bunion: Paul's surname
Rectum: Dang near killed him
Paradox: Two doctors
Coronary: Domesticated Yellow Bird
Constipation: Endangered feces
Penis: Someone who plays the piano
Humerus: To tell us what we want to hear
Intestine: Currently taking an exam
Outpatient: A person who has fainted
Genital: Non-Jew
Sacrum: Holy
Pap Smear: To slander your father
Pelvis: The evil twin of Elvis
Seizure: Roman Emperor
Cat Scan: When the Secret Service looks for Socks